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How Hard Should Parents Push Children to be Competitive?

Some parents are criticized for being disinterested in their children’s activities, but is there a point when parents are too involved?

A recent story in High School Pep Rally tells of two young sisters who are competing in high level endurance events. The article is not as much a tribute to their accomplishments as it is a criticism of their parents for pushing them so hard. The two girls, Kaytlynn, 12, and Heather Welch, 10, recently ran a grueling 13-mile cross country race with Kaytlynn winning the women’s division and her younger sister coming in third. Reaching that level of competitive excellence, however, takes intense training. The criticism of the parents that followed has been harsh. The opinion of many appears to be that the parents are pushing them too hard – that it is too intense for such young children and could have a damaging effect on their young, developing bodies.

This is not the first time this type of criticism has been leveled at parents of young athletes competing at the top of their game. The parents and coaches of young olympic athletes often face much the same type of criticism.

What do you think? Is there a point when parents should back off and let kids just be kids, even if they have the potential to be exceptional young athletes?

Darcey Bailey November 12, 2012 at 02:08 pm
I think parents need to be supportive of their kids. It's not our job to be coaches or teach them the plays, etc. It's our job to be supportive and positive with them no matter what. The coaches will tell them what they do right and what they do wrong. If they make a mistake the coaches will teach them how to correct it. That's what they are there for. Parents punishing kids for mistakes they have made is just wrong in my opinion. Sometimes it can make the child MORE nervous and they end up messing up more. It amazes me to see parents berating their kids at sporting events. I tell my son Great job no matter what happened. If he tells me he messed up I ask him what the coach said and tell him that he just needs to listen to the coach but as a parent I still think he did amazing. These kids need confidence and people being positive with them. They have to learn to LOSE too. You don't want to lose, but they have to be able to lose with dignity and respect.
Gail Moore November 12, 2012 at 06:29 pm
I have mixed emotions on this one, having been a gymnast in my early years. I really don't see this as any different from any child being driven through a gift for gymnastics, dance, baseball or golf ... or even with an exceptional musical inclination or (dare we say it) beauty pagents! Extensive training definitely has some side effects in physical maturity but as long as an athlete trains correctly, these are generally minimalized by Mother Nature in her own time.
As long as the child is committed to the sport, and not just the parent, I applaud them!
Sharon Swanepoel (Editor) November 12, 2012 at 07:19 pm
This is kind of a difficult one for me. My stepson, Brad, was a very good soccer player and was MVP at LHS his senior year. His father got frustrated when socializing began to take priority, but he did back off and not pressure him too much. Since then, there were times when Brad himself has said he wished his dad hadn't. He probably missed an opportunity because of it and I think he knows it. So what do you do?

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David Binder June 18, 2013 at 06:03 pm
And it's not posting my comment how I typed it. It's jumbled on the "Boards" banner.
Sharon Swanepoel (Editor) June 18, 2013 at 06:11 pm
Yea, sorry David. We are still dealing with some "issues." It rejected Jason's blog, andRead More none of us, not even our top regional editor, is being given authority to release it. Poor Jason, I know he so hates being rejected! And we hate it happening to him. The people not being "bugged" by technical issues, however, are reporting that it is super easy to use.
Tammy Osier June 18, 2013 at 01:08 am
Sadly, Mr. Newman, we have people who live in a utopic vision of the world and refuse to believeRead More that this can happen. Sounds a bit like 1984. Ironic too, is that in the bible, when the Lord was referring to people being blinded and going astray, he referred to them as sheep, and that phrase has been coined today to denote the same type of mentality. This could happen if our watchmen stop guarding the gate.
Karsten Torch June 18, 2013 at 12:39 pm
What's sad is that people will accuse you of needing a tinfoil hat because of this post. But weRead More are marching inexorably toward this end, the only thing we can really control is how quickly or slowly we get there.....
Tom Laverick June 18, 2013 at 01:06 pm
That looks similar to a lost dog poster at the corner of 81 and Bold Springs Road.
Sharon Swanepoel (Editor) June 18, 2013 at 03:05 pm
Tom, I will see if I can find the connection.
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Good news! Her name is Izzi and she has been reunited with her owners.
tijensen June 15, 2013 at 12:34 pm
The better assignment would have been how could you have written a letter to try and convince themRead More not to commit suicide. To persuade them about all the wonderful things you love about them, how special they are and what the world would miss if they were not in it. A creative teacher could have used the same exercise to teach a life lesson that may have helped someone save a life down the road.
Tammy Osier June 15, 2013 at 12:40 pm
TJ, exactly. Like you said, a GOOD teacher would have found a way to make students think outside theRead More box yet still examine the mood of the story. But I do agree with ggy that it might have been more appropriate for a college aged student. High school (girls especially) have so much drama going on inside of them, and confusion about so many things, that it might be impossible for them to be objective in an assignment like that. Boo to the teacher.
flyinby June 15, 2013 at 08:34 pm
strikes me as more subversive attempts by perverted minds dedicated to influence all our childrenRead More with this sick mindset: http://larouchepac.com/node/11188 http://www.naturalnews.com/040744_euthanasia_children_mercy_killings.html http://www.lifenews.com/2013/06/06/sarah-palin-blasts-sebelius-for-denying-girls-lifesaving-lung-transplant/ http://cnsnews.com/blog/judie-brown/lives-unworthy-be-lived-and-polst http://endoftheamericandream.com/archives/the-elite-are-attempting-to-convince-us-that-killing-off-our-sick-grandparents-is-cool-and-trendy suicides higher than car crashes past few yrs http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2207089/56-million-suicide-prevention-programme-launched-study-reveals-Americans-lives-die-car-crashes.html http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2013/02/08/more-states-consider-legalizing-assisted-suicide-as-baby-boomers-age/
Octo Slash June 14, 2013 at 12:18 pm
My kids drink coffee every morning because they need something to accompany their cigarettes.
Tammy Osier June 14, 2013 at 01:12 pm
Tr - the perfect diet - the Mediterranean diet has a lot of fish in it. Olive oils etc... OurRead More American diet has a lot of animal fat in it and look at us as opposed to other nations! Fish oil is brain food. A multi is good, but we should ask our pediatricians about adding fish oil to our kids' diets. We should get our (good) fats through diet. Good fats help vitamins go where they are supposed to and do what they're supposed to do.
Deedee June 15, 2013 at 08:12 pm
My grandma always drunk coffee all day and I started around 30 and I am no good without at least oneRead More cup a day but she always stated that we couldn't have any as kids because it will stunt our growth. I have always felt that there is something to many of those old sayings and did not let my son touch it.
Tammy Osier June 17, 2013 at 01:53 pm
DR, seems like an oxymoron doesn't it? I'd like to hear from someone who is actually from there toRead More find out their spin on why they even enter a contestant in the first place. It's my understanding that a woman that shows that much skin in public will be flogged or worse? Maybe democracy is taking ahold in some places, who knows?
Good Grief Y'all June 17, 2013 at 03:24 pm
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Karsten Torch June 17, 2013 at 04:30 pm
Couple of thoughts - One, why hold it in a land where there is going to be this kind of protest?Read More Just move it and don't worry about it. Other, I find it interesting how the Muslims want us to be understanding and inclusive of their beliefs, but don't even think they'll allow anything they don't agree with. Just a tad bit hypocritical...
R June 14, 2013 at 02:06 am
You mean the FEES don't you? Cause they aint taxes don't you know...
Bonnie June 14, 2013 at 11:50 am
I call it a "rainbow!"
M.K. Osborne June 14, 2013 at 03:30 pm
Fees is when its lightning too .
Mr. B June 13, 2013 at 01:29 pm
They're not Americans. They don't deserve to step foot on American soil.
Good Grief Y'all June 13, 2013 at 01:34 pm
Meh, a difference without distinction.
Good Grief Y'all June 13, 2013 at 01:37 pm
Huh, you learn something once in a while on Patch blog threads. I didn't know you must be anRead More American citizen to be tried and convicted of crimes against America . . . ;p I think John and Sarah could handle them . . . you betcha! They would probably beg to be sent back to Gitmo. LOL
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Reunited!
Good Grief Y'all June 12, 2013 at 11:43 am
The top marginal tax rate in 1945 was 94%; today it is 35%. This info from one of the slides in theRead More article on various tax charts, including corporate. "A look at 2010 data reveals that the U.S. is one of the least taxed countries in the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD), according to a study released Monday by Citizens For Tax Justice. The CTJ added up federal, state and local tax revenue. The only countries in the OECD that collected a smaller percentage in taxes are Chile and Mexico, according to the data. The OECD is a group of 34 countries that work together to improve the global economy." http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/08/us-lowest-taxes-most-industralized-countries_n_3039470.html?utm_hp_ref=business&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl1%7Csec3_lnk2%26pLid%3D295994
Good Grief Y'all June 12, 2013 at 12:30 pm
So, B, are you saying no corporations pay taxes? If that were true, why do they offshoreRead More manufacturing and money to avoid and evade? Some don't pay depending on their structure, many do. US corps don't pay as much as most in developed countries, and they sure won't go along with paying more or seeing their CEOs pay more on individual returns. According to the OECD as mentioned in the link, US corporations pay an e f f e c t i v e rate of 13%. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/08/us-lowest-taxes-most-industralized-countries_n_3039470.html?utm_hp_ref=business&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl1%7Csec3_lnk2%26pLid%3D295994
Maria Navarro June 13, 2013 at 04:36 pm
Most of the government organizations cannot be trusted, as they have been filled with mostly crooksRead More (not all, but a good majority who use their power to fill their pockets)therefore, I think the IRS should be abolished. We need to go to a FAIR TAX and this way EVERYONE would have to pay their fair share!